Regardless of how COVID will shift our family gatherings this year, we need to keep our boundaries in mind.
It’s easy to get together with family and slide back into old patterns because that’s where we think we fit in. That’s our place of comfortability. It’s hard to hold a boundary when everyone wants us in the old box.
Quickly, we can find ourselves out of sync with the newly-created us we’ve been developing.
Instead, we need to model for everyone around us how we want to be perceived and treated. There will be pushback at first but, as we hold, people will eventually respect the boundaries we set.
Who you are, how you show up matters – even in family gatherings.
If you can hold your boundaries with family, you will be able to hold your boundaries anywhere. And we know money flows to the person who has strong, healthy boundaries.
Here’s the 3-2-1 on this aspect of the Attitude of Boundaries.
- Setting boundaries begins with us. We have to make a conscious effort to follow our own rules. If we give ourselves a pass on holding our boundary, others won’t see they have to hold them either.
- It’s easy to hold our boundaries with strangers. Much harder to do with people who know us, especially family. We’ve already set the social construct with family and friends and have “agreements” in place of how each person is supposed to behave.
- When we change those “agreements” by setting and holding new boundaries, people react. Be prepared for a response. Remember love and grace (for them and self) and hold the boundary anyway.
- Create your boundaries. What are the rules you want to have around this holiday season?
- Envision your upcoming gatherings and determine how you want these interactions to go.
- What new boundary am I going to commit to holding with myself and family during the holidays?
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To your impact and legacy,